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Grief can be awesome, beautiful and holy. It means you've successfully loved so deeply that you now get to grieve this person who has passed. We are often afraid to expose our grief, so we hold back the inner emotions within us. Instead of running from tears, we should allow them to surface. It's natural, healing and a sign of healthy affections.

How do you grieve in the best way?

1. Don't put a time line on it. Don't wrap it in a box and hope it looks a certain way. Grief is very individualized.

2. Relax into grief. Relax into the emotion. Your body can handle this emotion and likely needs to process. You don't have to react or resist or push against it. You can handle it, It's not intolerable, so surrender into the feelings grief exposes.

3. Remember the people around you want to help because they love you. Decide that these people are coming from a place of love, However, they don't know what to do to help unless you tell them. They likely haven't often dealt with this situation either. Tell them what you need and how to best to support you.

This experience at the gravesite of Alex's brother was beautiful and sweet experience as we stood in that cemetery in Sao Paolo. I'm grateful to be able to sing a teary Happy Birthday in Portuguese with Alex and his parents as they reflected on their love. Their love and grief was palpable even 28 years later.... and remarkably sadness once felt, turned to joy. 

If you need help around the process of grieving for a loved one you're missing, or something else that is going on in your life...please reach out.

Tchau,

Melinda